Congratulations, Now Quit Goofing Off

"My whole body is sore," the eight year old said the morning after a swim meet. She is swimming 100's without flinching, winning 50's against any age at the Jewish Community Center inter-club meets. It was her only complaint. I wanted to write a note to her teacher, telling her that she might be more in her own zone today than usual - and ask her for help on how to improve her reading comprehension skills. I had reviewed her papers the day before: a stack of 90's and 100's on all subjects except for reading comprehension. Those were always in the 60's. "Look at this," I said to my husband. "Less television, more reading and talking about what we are reading."

He reviewed. "These quizzes are only three questions long. If she misses one it's automatically a 66," he said, defending her somehow. I thought that if the quizzes were six questions long, it was not so off base to assume she would get two answers wrong, but I said nothing. "And look at the question," he continued. "'What was the point of the story?' it asks and she always answered 'to entertain.' That's what she thinks books are, wonderful entertainment. That is not such a bad thing." Lex laughed at how he mocked the test and how he presented Edit's frame of mind, and maybe a little because someone was giving me a challenge to my grade grief. He laughed too. He thought testing and grading at elementary levels to be ridiculous, and all this was further proof. There was nothing only 2/3s right with his daughter. I was the sole sourpuss in the room. "Everything is about entertainment, all that Disney and Nick TV, and Club Penguin on the computer. That's this generation's mindset."

It's hard to get severe when I see my children do some things - most things - so beyond expectations. But I do. It's not that I expect people to be perfect. But at the same time, I see their respective failings as being so out of sync with the order of their natural selves, that they must be my fault - my refusal to take the time to observe and correct early on. Winter's night darkness is here. I woke up this morning thinking we should get back to meals at the table, more games in the evening, and trips to the library. It's easy and cozy, as long as I'm willing to give up the computer, too, while they are awake.